There are two camps in the autism debate. One camp is desperately trying to “cure” the child of their autism, while the other is accepting autism and working with it in any way they can.
You will find the majority of autism parents are in the cure camp. These are the “Warrior Moms,” the ones who do the gluten-free, casein-free, meat-free, any diet they think will suddenly make their child not autistic. They blame vaccines. They make their children drink Miracle Mineral Solution, which is glorified bleach, or they give their children MMS enemas, thinking killing gut bacteria will change brain function. In short, they are constantly searching for a cure for the way the child’s brain works. And why not? The autistic brain, in their mind, only belongs to a parasitic moron. They are also the parents who, in their frantic hatred and fear of autism, give their children the basically abusive Applied Behavior Analysis. Then, once their children display compliance and conformity out of fear of not being fed, for example, they declare their child is “no longer autistic.” And the child cannot say no to the person who wants them to stop stimming for fear of looking weird, for example. “Quiet hands,” they say. Of course, what if the child cannot say no to being raped in the future? That has happened to almost every autistic girl I have talked to. They were told not to say no, and they could not say no to sex, and therefore were raped. And the rapist got away with it. This is a hugely common story I have come across. Of course, this is just one example of how all these woo-filled therapies are harmful to the autistic child. As you can guess, the children in the cure camp generally have negative outcomes. Many of them commit suicide. Many live in institutions, drugged, isolated and restrained; beyond reach. Many of the autistic children become resentful, antisocial autistic adults. Do you want this to happen to your autistic children?
There is a better way. There is another camp, which is in the minority. These parents are accepting of their children’s autism. They understand that autism is a lifelong condition, and with proper education, training and support, their children grow up better. One of these people is Holly Robinson-Peete, and her husband Rodney Peete. Their son is autistic. He is also an aspiring model. Now, I might anticipate that due to the flashing cameras and lights, this might be hard for him, but every autistic person is as different from the next as any other person. Perhaps modeling plays into their son’s strengths. This is a good example of what can happen when you accept a condition, and learn how to work with it.
I’ll tell you something about my experience with both of these camps. On one end, my father never truly accepted my autism. He would always say “alleged” autism. He claimed that to the day he died. I don’t know if any member of his generation accepts my autism that has not died. Fortunately, even though I did not have my father in my corner when he was alive, I had my mother. She pursued an accurate diagnosis, which turned out to be autism. She worked with it, and actually praised my accomplishments and milestones, even though they were all out of proper age points. For instance, I could read before I could tie my shoes. But I digress; she praised them both as they came. As I learned to work with what hand I was dealt, it came apparent to me that accepting a child the way they were was more constructive than denying or trying to “cure” the undesirable condition. Forward to 2016: I now do most of the cooking and maintaining the house, but I cannot drive yet. I’m still out of sync with other people, but I do not care what they think anymore. Even though it’s mostly online, I now share my experiences with the rest of the world, to help those like me – even if they are only like me in being autistic. I would rather work with an Accepting Parent than a Curing Parent when dealing with autism. The Accepting Parent will have a better outcome coming for their autistic child.