Quickshots – December 13, 2017

  1. Why does it take having a daughter to care about half the people on the planet?
  2. Why does it take having a child with autism to care that autistic people exist?
  3. Why does it take having autism yourself to accept that autistic people are good for society?
  4. Why do autistic people have few allies besides my mother?

Ableism in Action: “To Siri With Love”

WARNING: Mentions of medical abuse, ableism, and prejudice


I was certain I had nothing to say about a book I never read. The book “To Siri with Love” seems to me biased and anti-autistic, with some thoughts about forced sterilization and not being able to picture having sex without the Benny Hill soundtrack in the mother’s head, for example.

Well, here’s a few statements I jotted down in my journal. Take a look, judge if you must:


Just wondering: how much ableism is “To Siri With Love”? A whole bathtub of ableism, as I have heard. My mother recently told me not to read negative things about autism; trouble is, “To Siri With Love” is one of those things. Saying your son can’t have sex in your head without the Benny Hill soundtrack, that’s ableism. Saying you want to sterilize him by force, that’s ableism. Saying no woman will want him, that’s ableism.

I haven’t talked about it before, because I haven’t read the book. I don’t think I’ll be able to in the near future, unless I rent it electronically. I have a strange feeling that I will be triggered like I used to be in the days of living with my sisters.

I tried to get the book “To Siri With Love” through the library. It was not there. I hear you can only buy it through Amazon. And you can only review it if you can buy it through Amazon. I wanted to come to the book with an open mind, but its mind is so closed that I feel I have to protect myself from Judith Newman.


Unfortunately, I have not read the book, as I have stated before, but it seems the book was not written for me, as Judith Newman actually states. See, I am autistic. I am also a woman who wants to work with autistic people. So, Judith Newman says this book is written for me. Which one is it, Judith? Am I good enough for you or not?

Forgive me, it is a bit rambling, but I am certain the hatred toward people like me will increase based upon “To Siri With Love.”


Here’s the lowdown: I wanted to approach “To Siri with Love” with an open mind, but the author has approached autistic people, including me, with a closed mind. And how am I supposed to respond to that?

About Shaun Murphy’s Flat Voice

NOTE: This is about the TV Series “The Good Doctor.”  

Now, I’ve heard a lot of criticism about Shaun Murphy’s flat voice. It normally does not affect me personally, but I know it seems like a stereotype. So many things can seem like a stereotype, but if a person matches one or two particular stereotypes, it could be terrible, but it can be mitigated by the presence of somebody who does not fit the stereotypes. As “The Good Doctor” makers are just getting the show off the ground, they have not learned that yet.   

I decided to formulate theories as to why Dr. Murphy’s voice is flat. Here are a few theories:  

  1. It is due to the lack of training in Shaun Murphy’s past. I have yet to see a vocal training session or learning as to the man’s voice in the show, so this theory may be disproven in time. But have autistic people been given speech therapy to address that, at least?  
  1. Trauma has affected Shaun Murphy, so he regressed in vocal progress. The storyline shows major traumatic episodes in Dr. Murphy’s past, and more could be coming. People facing trauma often regress in behavior. I have often done this myself, when aware and when not, for comfort. 
  1. Shaun has not quite learned or gotten how to speak neurotypically yet. Now this seems to be the most plausible. Has Shaun been given classes or therapy on how to speak normally? Better yet, can he possibly learn to speak neurotypically in the future? A little background on this theory: I myself have been told I did not learn how to speak like neurotypical people until I was about thirty. I learned in eventually speaking in a group therapy setting, mimicking my peers. My mother had to point it out to me, by the way. According to her, “A light went on.” Often, that’s what happens with me. I’m not saying Dr. Murphy is exactly like me, I’m just saying the vocal change could play out like that.  

It is of huge consequence how autistic people are portrayed in the media. Raymond “Rain Man” Babbit has dominated the conversation for decades, especially since people continue to put their fingers in their ears and try to block out what autistic people are saying. Yeah, neurodiversity relations are that bad, but I’m not surprised by that.  

After Thanksgiving: Time of Rest

You know, it’s hard to cook a Thanksgiving dinner. What’s even harder is when the person who cooks Thanksgiving dinner decides to turn immediately around and try to put up Christmas the very next day. As I write, I have not finished my own decorating. The outside decorations and the tree are not up yet, but the rest of it is – and I mostly did the work on Saturday. Why? Because I needed to rest. No, I did not start decorating until it was almost evening on Friday, because I had to rest from Thanksgiving. To give you an idea of what I did, I counted the dishes this year, and I had fifteen. That’s right, the turkey came with a platoon. It’s the only way my mother and I know how to cook Thanksgiving. That’s even with cutting back a few dishes. So, with all the cutting, dicing, basting, baking, roasting, stirring, nursing, putting together, and making sure it came out at the same time, no wonder I was tired. Besides, my body had to focus on digesting the platoon as well. Is it any wonder I was so tired the next day? And some people want to go out and shop in the melee known as Black Friday in that condition? Well, let’s see what the average autistic is up against. 

Just do a web search for Black Friday and you’ll see crowding, desperation, fights, loud music, those cinnamon broomsticks and pine cones that burn your nose, flashing lights, a daunting selection of should I buy this, violence – and you want to put an autistic person in the middle of that?  


Believe me, the Hulk is not outside the realm of possibility when it comes to meltdowns.

Cyber Monday is much better for autistic people. Rest and relaxation is better for autistic people. Sometimes I just don’t know my own limits.  

Laina Eartharcher’s “Autism is Nothing to Fear. Are You Scared of Me?”

I live in the US, where the predominant feeling surrounding the autism spectrum is fear. Parents decline to vaccinate their children because because they’re afraid they’ll wind up autistic. Parents, I hear you, on a certain level. Some children really do react badly to vaccines. I’ve heard too many stories, even from people I know–reasonable […]

via Autism is nothing to fear. Are you scared of me? — the silent wave