To the Parent or Guardian of..

Real Autism

In all my posts about living with Autism and having Autism, I’ve not yet gone to the otherside of the coin. However; as my mum and I learn to handle the ins and outs of my chronic illness, I got back to thinking about how it must’ve been for her while I was growing up Autistic as well. Since we never actually knew that was the case.

Specifically, how does the other side feel? We all know that for the child it is hard and complicated. With many things for them to overcome, combat and learn how to do. But I like to remind myself that it isn’t any easier on the parents or guardian’s either.


Generally, when a child is born the parent is given a great big list of things they are expected to do to make sure that said child grows up perfect. This is generally a…

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Autistic Utopia Concerns

I was recently moved by In My Autistic Utopia by my fellow blogger, “autisticliving” about certain traits considering a dominantly autistic society. They are a basic list of problems which would be solved if autistics ran the world. These are basic things, like “You get to work and live in a sensory environment that fits you and doesn’t overload you” and “Special interests are encouraged and actively used in education.” These are basic, but it got me thinking: how would different people be treated in this autistic utopia? For instance, would we autistics be going around inventing “Pervasive Allistic Disorder,” for example? Would we classify that they would be “obsessed with looking into the eyes,” and “excessive talking,” for example? Would we be obsessed with “finding a cure for allism” and saying that the Allistic population was “missing”? Would we mock them because they had not the concentration to give to a special interest? It troubles me to think of such a world, where people are ridiculed for being different. This world is too much like our own world, where we autistic people are treated so poorly. I read that 81% of us were unemployed. I figured that would be true, simply because I am unemployed, even though I held down a job for six years. I also learned that some people will not hire autistic people. What are they afraid of – that autism is contagious? It is certainly not contagious, or the entire population would have “caught” it already. Are we too focused, and can beat them in their own games, because it might be our special interest? People, making another type of person dominant is not the answer. It is human nature to fear and hate the different. This might have served some strange purpose in the past, but it does not serve our society now. Prejudice and discrimination do not serve people anymore. I hate to say it, but working to make your particular neurotype, age, race, or even gender the dominant one makes you no better than the violent, bigoted Ku Klux Klan. Dominating only creates corruption. An accepting society where all are welcome is what we need to strive for, and that may only be achieved through understanding, compassion and love.

History: The Good Kind….June 7, 2015

I was a baby the last time yesterday’s achievement was reached. I was born in 1977. In 1978, Affirmed was the last to win the Triple Crown in my lifetime. As you have noticed, it is now 2015. Finally, a second horse has achieved the elusive Triple Crown again. American Pharoah (no, it was originally misspelled), a 3-year-old colt from Zayat Stables, has won the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness Stakes, and the Belmont Stakes. Yes, you have to win every single one of those races to get the Triple Crown. It is rare that a good event makes headlines in the news. Most of the time, the news is about war, disease, crime, and the like. It can actually get depressing when you look at it. That is why I can usually stand news one half hour a day.

Last time people were so positive was the early days of the year 2000 – and that was only after the panic known as the Y2K glitch, about the way computers displayed the year on the computer-changed in a panic from 2 digits to 4 digits. (I wonder how many of those computers are still running nowadays?) Again, that was followed by controversy, terrorism, war, disease, crime, and the like…I sensed a theme in the news again. The 2000s were basically the decade of fear. (It depended on who you talked to when Obama was elected: there were the black and white dividers, as well as the red-and-blue dividers.)

The end of the Cold War was the time of extreme positivity before that. For the US, basically, it was a time of hope, of peace, of change. It was a time of revolution for most of Eastern Europe. Of course, ending a Cold War, as we soon learned, broke the nations out into Hot Spots (an actual punchline used in a comic strip!). Yugoslavia’s civil war and eventual breakup was very disappointing, as there were such horrid war crimes – and women got the worst of it, with systematic rapes by oppositions for all of them. (Yes, I had to mention that – rape was actually used as a war tactic by all sides. I would not be surprised if ALL the women and girls of the Balkans alive at the time were rape victims.) Another disturbing trend soon to come alive were school shootings, starting in the 1990s. For the record, a school shooting would definitely make headlines, but when does a school Model United Nations team ever make headlines? (Do you even know what that is, by the way? It is so little reported on that I doubt many people do.) Or when does a school’s positive activities get on the front page? This is why I cherish good news headlines – they are so rare.

Good news headlines are so rare, I cherish them. There is a statement made by the news media: “If it bleeds, it leads.” I mean, even in the news broadcast of today, it took four headlines of terrible news to even mention American Pharoah’s Triple Crown victory. That I extremely disturbing. Why do people want to hear such fear and negativity? Or, why does the media seem to think so? You scare the children with the way you currently display news – all that fear and negativity. I was scared throughout the 1980s (my childhood decade) when the news was on. I’m not even sure my mother let me watch it, it scared me so. Only when real historical things were going on was when I watched the news. Good news is rare, and good news is usually pushed to the back of the paper or broadcast. I cherish when it makes headlines, even when it takes 37 years to do it.

Shaming Bodies, Hating Ourselves

“EAT A SANDWICH!” “LOSE SOME WEIGHT!” “Anorexic.” “With how fat you are, it’s a wonder you got a husband.” These are some of the contradicting statements made on a woman who is “too skinny” or “too fat,” and thereby worthy of shaming. It just really hit me that ALL women, not just us plus-size “big girls” are getting body shaming. I guess it’s a revelation when you learn you are not alone in one fight. I really thought I was alone as I got fat shamed in the comments section of anywhere. My weight is none of your business, thank you, though people seem to think some stranger’s weight is their business. It’s for their health, you say! But is it really for your health, as you claim, or is it because you don’t want to look at it? Is it about THEM, or is it about YOU?

Most of the time, I surmise it is about you. People seem to go after a certain body type because it is too much one way or another. Take, for example, my own guilty actions: I have often compared myself to Keira Knightley (and I’m sorry for doing so), finding myself coming up short. Maybe I should not hold her up on that perfect-body pedestal. Some bloggers called her “anorexic,” which I suspect is not true. My own experience with weight and body is markedly different, but I have known people who can eat double the meat and cheese in a burger than me and not gain a pound. Bodies are different, people! Why are we shaming them when they are similar or different? I haven’t been this objectively cruel to Melissa McCarthy or Tess Holliday (though others have), but why be cruel in the first place? to anybody?

I suspect, as I learn through apology blogs (like this one), that this is a personal-societal condition called “training the woman to hate herself in order to keep me (the man) in power.” Now, women are trained to hate their looks by being gotten to obsess on them. A good example of this is Caitlyn Jenner. For those who do not know, Caitlyn Jenner is the woman Bruce Jenner is transitioning into. Before, as Bruce, the media focused on the courage it took to confess what was in “his” heart. After Caitlyn emerged, however, it was all about “her” looks that people talked about. We are well-trained, from birth, what to value in a person, especially where gender is concerned. In women, it is clearly looks and caretaking, or measuring up to the Great Standard of Beauty. In men, it is strength and money making, or the Great Protector-Provider stereotype. Both genders are taught to shallowly measure a person’s worth by these Grand Illusions, these theoretical and clearly non-existent people. I am looking for this from a woman’s viewpoint, but I wanted to get out that men fall down under the weight of their own Grand Illusion as well. In relating to the woman’s view, she is taught to obsess about her looks, because that is her apparent value – as a DNA packet and child-bearer, because her worth is in bearing children and…no, that’s it. Bearing children, preferably sons. I am not liking this kind of thinking. It does not help anyone to measure them up to a standard they will fail anyway. But if they do, people will automatically assume that people cheated to make that standard, such as through eating disorders for women, or steroids for men. People, by these impossible, unattainable measurements, are taught to hate themselves and each other, and they do. As a result, we get nasty internet comments, because we need to spread around this hate and make others as miserable as we ourselves are.

I hope I have enlightened you on people’s general tendency toward keyboard bullying.

What If People With Autism Are Actually Hyperfunctional?

This is a really interesting way to see Autism. I’m reblogging. Guest Blogger: Time Magazine


Most people who think about autism think of people who struggle or are inept in some ways, especially when it comes to social behaviors. But there’s growing evidence that the autistic brain may actually be more super-wired to detect and absorb cues from the outside world.

Now, a new study published in the journal Frontiers in Neuroscience suggests that the brains of people with autism are actually hyperfunctional rather than stunted or impaired, and that if treated early in a very predictable environment, symptoms could diminish.

In 2007, researchers Kamila Markram, Henry Markram, and Tania Rinaldi developed an alternative theory for what autism is, called the “Intense World Syndrome.” They believe that autism is not some form of mental deficit, but that the brain is actually supercharged and hyperfunctional. This makes stimuli overwhelming to people with autism, causing them to socially and emotionally withdraw as a mode of self-protection.


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The Duggars, The Jenners, And The Growing Exodus From Christianity

Remember the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant (Matthew 18:23-25).

john pavlovitz

Sometimes revelation comes in just 140 characters.

Tonight I had another Christian tell me on social media that he was okay with Josh Duggar fondling young girls “because he repented”, but has a big problem with Caitlyn Jenner, who he said was willingly sinning and being “sexually deviant.” The former he sees as a typically flawed believer restored and deserving of our forgiveness, the latter as an unrepentant, dangerous presence in the world who needs to be condemned and called out.

As we talked more, my virtual friend’s comments clarified the duplicity of his position: a child molester is excused because he’s said sorry to God (even though he and his family concealed the activity until recently exposed), however a transgender individual is clearly immoral by openly seeking to be the most authentic version of herself she believes is possible. One engages in criminal activity and still gets the benefit of the doubt, while the other operates completely within the law and is still vilified…

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Black Widow Left Out of Avengers Movie Toy Line

Remember when I told you how mad I was at the fact that my brother did not get the girl action figure in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles set? I wanted to play, too. I had to do a makeshift action with a She-Ra doll I found among some trash in the alleyway near my house. Don’t they see that girls want to play with superpowers? Those emotions of feeling left out came flooding back when I learned that Disney and Marvel purposely left out making Black Widow and Scarlet Witch action figures for the Avengers movies.

Alright, Disney. Where in the world is my Black Widow action figure?! I know you did not make them because the Avengers was apparently a “boys’ thing.” But, there are some girls out there who actually LIKE playing and pretending with superpowers. Did Elsa from Frozen not teach you that? I am very, very disappointed in you, Disney and Marvel. I know you think girls cannot comprehend the utter coolness of super powers – but you are wrong. Completely, willfully, ignorantly, WRONG. Magical powers is an offshoot of super powers. I know there are women out there who agree with me, whether they be Lana Wachowski or Adrianne Curry. Do you not realize that half the world is women? It is time to acknowledge that they exist, and they want to play with superhero action figures, too. The want to see themselves with powers, and abilities. I hope you can get your heads out of the Dark Ages and see that someday. For now, I will stay mad until I get a Black Widow or Scarlet Witch action figure.