For those who follow my Facebook account, I was a mess on Halloween night. I was taken off one of my medications, and bawling my eyes out over the stupidest thing-those “sexy” Halloween outfits! Normally I laugh at this sort of thing. I mean, “sexy” pizza? “Sexy” Big Bird (yes, that’s a costume)? I looked at that and wondered how I would be able to get a man. I mean, I would like a man, but I don’t need one. Anyway, the whole point is, I am not a model. Trouble is, models are the only thing the world wants. They want perfect little bonbons of a woman to show off to their friends like a bangle. To them, women are possessions. The whole world is Donald Trump when it comes to women. Marry them, produce a child or two, then dump them when they get too old or too fat. I am doomed to be an outsider, if it were not for these two words: …but God.
You see, the world looks at the outside of a woman. You know, like Donald Trump. But God looks at the character of the woman. I mean, the ideal woman – the one described in Proverbs 31 in the Bible – has no known physical characteristics. It talks about what she does, what kind of relationship she has, but no defined talk about her eyes, her weight, or her skin color. Compare that to the content of Vogue. All they talk is “thinness, money, bitchiness.” So the only way I’ll get a man is to be a stick-thin rich trinket? I mean, how are you going to stay attractive that way if you get pregnant? I’m still convinced Hollywood and the world is Donald Trump when it comes to women. That’s why I don’t like the way Hollywood is. I go by the Bible, because a woman there is strong and true. I’ll get more into it later on, but the right man, if I’m supposed to have one, is coming for me in God’s time.
By now, you have all heard that Jerry Seinfeld has revealed he might be on the autism spectrum. He says it’s on a long, drawn-out scale, but I believe it’s not that long and drawn-out from my position. We have a lot of things in common: We both struggle to communicate. We both have troubles with similes, metaphors and idioms. Both of us rehearse what we are going to say: him onstage, me just in public. So you see, we are not that far from each other. And that’s not bad. One of the things that upsets me so much about the “Autism Community” is that many of them discount those of us with autism as not being able to speak, or, dare I say it, retarded. (Normally I would use Carlos Mencia’s phrase “Dee dee dee” to describe people being or acting stupid, but the word retarded usually carries the same connotation to most in the “Autism Community.”) They discount our experiences, and when they come to a self-diagnosis, or somebody who advocates on their own, they are too blinded by their own experiences to open their minds to this particular experience. I believe this is one of the reasons people in the “Autism Community” tend to throw shade at somebody who has self-diagnosed autism, especially a celebrity. This is why I differentiate between the “Autism Community” and the Autistic Community. The “Autism Community,” mostly perpetuated by Autism Speaks, has a large crowd of people believing that we MUST. CURE. AUTISM-even at the expense of aborting babies who may potentially have it. The Autistic Community, however, unites in love and respect towards themselves. We need more of that love and respect, not the devious “cure,” discrimination and hate that the world and the “Autism Community” seems to pedal. So, without further ado, I am glad to welcome into the Autistic Community a new celebrity member, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld. May he join the echelons of Thomas Jefferson, Daryl Hannah, Dan Aykroyd, and yes, Temple Grandin. Let us unite in love and respect.
Last night, I went to a place where I could just be myself. It was loud, noisy and super crowded, but it was crowded with the right kind of people – people who accepted me just the way I am. There were all kinds of people with disabilities-wheelchairs and walking included. I played games, made pictures, and did all sorts of dancing. You can look at all the pictures on my Facebook page (Cambria Lynn Jenkins). We had so much fun. It is a huge party called the Jesus Prom. What people do is invite those with illnesses and disabilities (and those are just common words, simmer down) to a large party, where they eat, play games, and dance. This year, camping was the theme, so we dressed down. People wore plaid, denim or camouflage gear. There was even a Duck Dynasty guy dressed up. We had barbecued chicken, with camp food sides, and played games. I love games, especially ones that challenge me. We also did dancing and I got my makeup done – really well, too. Overall, I had fun.
The whole point of the Jesus Prom is to bring people who are normally left out of the love and church activity equation in. I am not saying it as an insult; I am just stating an observation. Many people, including the caretakers of those with these conditions, are left out of the love and activity equation. Many people tend to think disabled equals stupid, but due to lack of an ability to communicate, this is often not the case. I am glad I am one of those who are finally let in. We need more Jesus Proms. We could bring the Jesus Prom to churches everywhere. Just pray about it.
I have to apologize for being away. I have been volunteering my time at my local Republican Party office. I have gotten into the thick of things in order to help people vote, and maybe persuade them to vote to the Republican side. You don’t have to vote my way, of course, but that’s beside the point. That’s what elections are for: the choosy public.
There are a few things about politics that bug me, but mostly one: negative ads. I’ll simply say this: If we were to vote AGAINST somebody-say, everybody but one person to be elected-then negative ads would be alright. But it flies in the face of my logic, because we are voting FOR them. I mean, wouldn’t negative ads make more sense if they were not wanting to see them win the name on the ballot, like at Survivor’s Tribal Council? Maybe then negative ads would make more sense. I prefer positive ads-ads showcasing the one you are voting FOR, and what they have done in their communities and regions as a whole. I would prefer to vote for somebody, not against.
Another thing that bothers me, which came about in recent years: the extra-long campaign. I mean, I was sick of hearing about Mitch McConnell and Alison Lundergan Grimes in June, not to mention now at the end of October! (Yes, I live in Kentucky.) I mean, can anyone really stand for a campaign that lasts longer than the actual term of office? I think not. We are shoving off the election and getting a low voter turnout because we are sick of it! It’s not even 2015 yet, and we are now talking about 2016! I AM ALREADY SICK OF 2016!
That’s all I have for tonight. Check with me back after the election. Of 2014.
TRIGGER WARNING: MMS
I came across a “solution” for autism: Miracle Mineral Solution, or MMS. I won’t give you the gory details, but the mere gist: pumping what is now known as industrial-strength bleach up a rectum or down the throat as “treatment” for autism. I have never heard of such quackery in my life. This brings me to a different question, besides the obvious ones: What is the message you are sending to your children? Be neurotypical or die? Chances are, the children who have autism but are acting neurotypical are doing so in order to be accepted by their parents or peers, especially in cases of these bleach enemas. They are getting the message loud and clear: We do not want you to be yourself. Far be it from me to give parents advice, but if you are clearly torturing your child with bleach enemas, they might have grounds to rebel and emancipate themselves just to get away from you as they get older. I am of course taking I to the extreme, but harmful treatments which clearly amount to torture are giving your child the message that he is not accepted. It reminds me of my father, but not in a good way. My father never accepted my autism, right up until he died. (I do not know if he accepts it now, in death, but I hope so.) I never felt truly loved and accepted because of this. Even now, it is hard for me to feel the true love and acceptance from my mother for these reasons. There is so much pain I feel for these children undergoing these MMS treatments, chelation and going unvaccinated due to this that I wonder if any parent truly, unconditionally loves their child? These are sad and terrible things to say, but I will have a meltdown if I do not get these hurt feelings out. The message is loud and clear: DO NOT BE AUTISTIC. BE NEUROTYPICAL OR DIE!
Now, I watched those Dr. Phil episodes-both of them. My previous posts did not seem to make one thing absolutely clear – that murder is wrong, no matter what Issy Stapleton did to her mother. No, I did not muse upon Issy’s autism because autism was not the issue here. The mental illness of the mother was the issue. You see, autism was just a red herring-a distraction from the real story of a mother’s failure to get treatment for herself. I thought I made that completely clear.
But why was autism such an easy red herring? Why is it so easy to blame autism for murder? My theory is fear. People fear autism so much that they want to get rid of it by any means necessary-even murder. It’s like the entire X-Men comic series-only in real life. Is it just me, or can every autistic remember being asked “Have you tried not being autistic?” by somebody? (“Have you tried not being a mutant?”)
I also noticed in the programs that Kelli Stapleton could not say “I tried to murder my child.” She KNEW what she did was wrong. She kept trying to “spin” it as “going to heaven.” Yeah, but did Issy have a say in this “going to heaven” bit? It was murder. And she could not say it because she would have to admit she did something wrong.
But one thing which Dr. Phil accidentally got right was this: the trigger was something the mother did. She was not “getting it,” to cite Dr. Phil’s own language, as to what was causing the meltdowns. Issy seems to be doing very well, indeed, without her mother. My instinct and guessing seemed that Mrs. Stapleton was not listening to find her daughter’s meltdown source. I mean, meltdowns always have a trigger. That is a rule of meltdowns. Anyway, I am mostly disgusted by the fact that the hatred and fear-mongering against autistics was nationalized to a television audience, but what do you expect? This is the world that ignored Hitler for a time, and also allowed Ray Rice to keep playing football until his abuse was leaked to the public. We must combat hate with love. That is not a contradiction. That love comes with understanding and with certain inalienable rights, such as the right to live. That is the reason we have the hashtag #JusticeForIssy.
One time, my mother was teaching me about proper table manners, and I got frustrated. I had known about my diagnosis for quite some time by then, so I blurted out, “But I’m autistic!” She then came back with this: “Does that mean you get away with bad table manners?” At the time, I knew the answer: of course not. Most people think when it comes to acceptance, we let the kid get away with whatever behavior they want. Nobody should do that. What we do instead, is teach them the ways of communicating to and acting around neurotypical people. Teaching a person a way of communicating, like teaching a language, does not change a person’s basic core. What it does in reality is give the person a map around the jungle we call society.
Society really is a jungle; a jungle that thinks people with autism cannot get around inside it. (Thank you, narrowing and stereotyping media.) When I reveal my autism, society says to me, “You don’t (look/act/sound) autistic!” I simply tell them it was good social training, or that I’m a good actress. They don’t believe I can function quite well in a conversation. I would like to pose them this question: What does autism look/act/sound like anyway? Plus, are they confusing it with another condition?
My point is, my mother never really saw any reason to “fix” me or change me, just teach me how to act in American society. Have you considered societal training and autism acceptance can coexist peacefully, hand in hand? They are not conflicting concepts. A person with autism can and will, with proper training, function quite well in society. That is something people outside of autism families must be taught.